Archive for the month “August, 2012”

DEEP WATERS (Friday, August 31, 2012)

I could swim in deep waters
The fish touching my body
For a blink of an eye
And slippery
Silver shine
Golden shine
Turquoise shine
Small and alone
Small and in clusters
Bigger and alone
Eyes wide open
Curious to get to know
Where I come from
And where I go
Except for the moray eel
Retreating in its cove
In thoughts:
‘’A fragile creature that is
Big, yet fragile
Skin so soft and defenseless
Carries no gig to threaten
Though not welcome down here
Have seen enough of them
Most thick and dark-skinned
Big-eyed, big-footed bubblers
With a light to make me blind
Off they go
To where they belong’’

I could swim in deep waters
Where the seaweed would not grasp my leg
To pull me down
The last trace of air rises up
Chest is filled with salty water
To explode into thousands of petals and confetti
To celebrate the ‘’holy’’ union
Man in black
Woman in white
Her pink lipstick is somewhat messy
With a trace on his mouth
His aftershave on her face
As they dance
Cheek to cheek
Heart to heart
Through the velvet night
‘’I love you
More than the words could say
My sunshine
My reason for living
I’ll never leave you
Until my last breath’’

I could swim in deep waters
And lie silently on the surface when tired
The moon would dress my silver gown
Swaying gently
Like the petals of a grenadine red poppy
Welcoming the breeze from the Sea
On a steep hill
Beside a narrow path barely visible
Stands a short tree with a thick body
A flow of ants down through the crack
The silent ceremonial march of the hundreds
Behind a small coffin covered with a flag
Of this and that color
With this and that figure
Another innocent child killed
In his mother’s arms
In the War
For Freedom and Democracy
In the name of Religion and the God
Against communism or capitalism
‘’Sleep, my baby, sleep
Now you are free’’

I could swim in deep waters
Who cares where I come from
And to where I am heading?


THE WALTZ (Thursday, August 30, 2012)

A gray beam of light
Leaked into the gray room
From a gray world
It was near dawn
After the darkness
Just before the colors rushed
In pure joy
A moment of suspense
Between what was
And what will be
A line of ink drawn on water
A white tail the plane leaves in the blue sky
A snowflake crystal resting on the black coat
But transitional
But loosely entangled
But transforming
Degrading and gathering

Cold it was
Summer had already waved bye
The morning breeze was determined
To keep me in my cozy bed
Beneath the sheets was my shelter
I ran into each day
Overloaded with words
Questions asked
Answers given
Soiled with words

Head buried under the quilt
Dazzled by the whirling dance of the thoughts
‘’That mahogany desk is what I’ve been looking for
But the color should be nutshell to match
Darn! The dishes are still in the washing machine!
The laundry’s full with boys’ shirts and pants
I need to go away
A break from this routine to breathe
But bills should be paid
Paychecks regularly received
Still no contact from him
Were my words so harsh?
I didn’t mean to
Just needed to vent
Yes, a mid-size desk would be perfect
To write in winter
Watching the outside
Sipping black coffee
And patiently waiting for the spring to come
Under the frozen tundra
Lies a world of wonders
The silence speaks out the loudest
So the seasons come and go
So the candle of life burns out’’

A faint whisper calls my name
Not even sure a man or a woman that is
Someone I know or a stranger?
Who cares?
Takes my hand
Leads me out swiftly
From the balcony
Down to the garden
To a yellow leaf of the apple tree
For a waltz
In pure joy

A moment of suspense
Between what was
And what will be.

ON THE BUS (Wednesday, August 29, 2012)

A watcher behind the window of an intercity bus
Life flows
People wave hands
They hug
Some cry
With tears
Some with joy
A man of thirties
Smokes on a pile of baggage
His wife probably
Pulls the arm of a crying boy harshly
A young couple in their own universe
A girl with big and dark sunglasses texting
Wipes her cheek with a tissue paper she’s hiding in her palm
Coming togethers
The faces change
The clothes and statures
Otherwise same stuff
Same shit
Day over day
No beginning
No ending

Tired of all this hassle
The watcher is ready
She takes a deep breath
Closes her eyes behind the window of an intercity bus
Stretches her leg
It gets longer and longer
Just like a cartoon movie character!
To reach past the passengers
Past the station and the city
Heading somewhere only she knows
Where there are no hands waved
No hugs given or received
No tears shed
No messages texted
No calls expected on the other end of the line

‘’I told you
I’d have taken you here much earlier
But you were afraid
To cut the threads off
I told you
They were so weak
Only to be smashed with one hand
Like a spider web in the corner’’
Whispers the little bird

‘’Thank you’’
Replies the Watcher
‘’Thank you for easing my pain
It wasn’t a big deal as I used to believe
I didn’t have any duties to carry out
Actually there were no obligations
Keeping my feet
Firmly here
Right here
The social roles I had to play were scam
So clear now that the veil is torn apart
Not a fancy mansion to work for
Or a trip to breathtaking places
Climbing the highest peaks
Diving in the deepest seas
Neither a love to live at its fullest
Seen enough
Felt enough
Had enough’’

The Watcher smiled at the bird on her shoulder

‘’Hey, m’am, are you okay?
Any doctor on?
Somebody call 911!’’

NIGHT-SAILING (Tuesday, August 28, 2012)

As the night slowly settles in
Throwing her cloak over the house
A faint joy covers my soul
The kitty’s fast asleep beside
She purrs when I tickle her neck

Time to get up
Time to move out

I step my foot carefully on the floor
And wriggle out of the quilt
Afraid to wake her up
Five steps and I’m at the stairs
The ritual is a silent swear
When the fourth from the top creaks
Finally I’m on the ground floor
No light on
But I reach for the keys
Hanging on the knob of the closet
The door is not locked
Nor the hinges squeak

Time to go out
Time to move on

Now I’m home
Dipping my feet in cool water
I smile
The boat smiles
A few maneuvers and we’re out in the sea
Eager to see what it will bring to me
The moonlight is all I need
And a refrain stuck in my head:
‘’Oh Girl
You stand by me
I’m forever yours

Time to sail away
Time to carry on

I release the net slowly
While the boat draws a wide circle
Stirring on the mirror surface
Weaves a beautiful lace
Pearl white
French lace
On the wedding dress
Slightly flared
Water drops on the net shine
Like embroidered crystals
No bride
No groom
The boat dances with me

Time to haul
Time to work

Not the least heavy
I can haul the net easily
Yet it’s swollen
Filled completely
A productive night it has been
I am happy
The boat is happy
As the inside glitters
With numerous stars entangled
The moon leaves us
Perhaps in jealousy
A spectacular scene, for sure
Bathing in the starlight
In the velvet night

Time to reap
Time to enjoy

I release the stars from the net
One by one
This is your smile
And this your soft kiss
The one I just set free is your warm hug
Here come your eyes on my eyes
Your heart beating next to mine
Your smell I take in deeply
Your hand caressing my arm
And your whisper:
‘’How soft you feel!’’

Time to sail
Time to go back

A faint joy covers my soul
The kitty’s fast asleep beside
She purrs when I tickle her neck.


‘’We’ll start with defining the impression
The background leaves on us’’

The colors are gloomy, indeed
Shades of black and brown in the background
Deep olive
Nothing that I can identify
No walls
No outside scene
Not even sure if night or day
I believe these did not matter to the artist
Personally, I don’t like ‘’nowhere’’ pictures
They shake me off from the Reality
To take me into the labyrinths of the Unconscious
A dangerous journey I would never dare

I don’t agree with you, Jim
Right, the colors are not vivid
No hint of an outside world
But this is because the artist did not want
To distract us from his main message
Do you think the figure in the center
Would be as striking as it is now
If he painted sky above
Ground below?
I don’t care if it is a nowhere picture or not
Besides, our minds would not let ‘’Uncertainty’’
Immediately building a story
Concrete and solid
I believe it’s an evening
Shadowed with thick gray clouds of rain
Just before the night leaks in
And tell me:
What is the Reality?
What binds you so tightly
To what you call ‘’the Reality’’?

‘’Thank you, guys
You do a great job
Now let’s proceed with the figure in the center
What do you think?
First, I’d like to hear how you describe it’’

It appears to be human
At least humanoid
A head on two shoulders
Two arms
And a body
The legs are not in the canvas
But he is faceless
No eyes or mouth
Though I can’t say a blank face
The details are too blurred to see
The figure is clearly distinct from the background
A continuum of the gloominess
By the way, I don’t see any light in this painting
How come I see him then?
A talented artist he must be
But what attracts me the most is his chest
That’s where the message lies in

You said you were not even sure
That was human
Let alone woman or man, Jim
And you say ‘’his’’ chest
Why do you think that must be a ‘’Man’’?
Why is the prototype of ‘’Human Being’’ is Man?
Another topic to discuss after dinner
While sipping wine in front of the fireplace
I believe the artist was greatly inspired by Munch’s ‘’Scream’’
But no scream can be heard
No horror can be seen in this ‘’faceless’’ human
As you say
The message is not on the face

‘’Our time for today is up
We’ll continue on Thursday
At three o’clock
In front of this picture in Hall A
To discuss its message
I believe you enjoyed this class
As much as I did
Hey! Where’s Jim?
He was right here a sec ago!’’

I saw him bending over the mouth of the cave
Cave or abyss, I’m not sure, though
Water was flooding in
He tried to reach out
To hold my hand
Off balance he stumbled in
And disappeared in the Whirling Darkness
No, not on the face
But the chest of the human figure
Where the message lies in.

THE LITTLE GIRL (Sunday, August 26, 2012)

‘’Little girl, little girl
Tell me
Where are you?
I called you yesterday morning
You did not show up to play’’

I’m busy
Too busy to play
Summer’s almost gone
The trees are waiting for me
To paint the leaves
With a palette from yellow to red
The North Wind will soon pick me up
And accompany in this dance
Hopping here
Hopping there
Bending right
Bending left
Turning in
Turning out
What a fun!
Come and join me

‘’Little girl, little girl
Tell me
What’s the reward?
A big house full of toys
Is what I’d settle for’’

I’m sorry
Really sorry that
All you would get is a rainbow crown
To shine day and night
A clear water drop at the tip of the leaf
To see the whole world in
A soft melody
To take you to the Golden Time
On the wings of a butterfly
Oh, I forgot!
A beautiful necklace of sun-dried bell peppers and eggplants
Gifted to the garden fence
And the sweet smell of tomato paste
To flood in the memories of forgotten times

‘’Little girl, little girl
Tell me
Where is your mother?
She will be mad at you
When she sees your dirty dress’’

I don’t know
Really don’t know
How long it has been since I last saw her
A slender figure
Not very tall
Tawny hair fastened at the neck
Thin fingers short nails
A mole on the inner aspect of each of her elbows
The right one on the upper
The left on the lower part
Her bosom soft and warm
My Pillow
Fragile arms
My Blanket I was afraid would break
I remember tears rolling down her cheeks
But not her eyes
Looking at me
Neither her voice
Lullabying me

‘’Little girl, little girl
Tell me
Where are you?
I will be your friend
And hold your hand’’

You can’t be my friend
You really can’t
I am now
Under the Thick Snow
Deep asleep.

THE NORTH TOWER CLOCK (Saturday, August 25, 2012)

What is the North Tower Clock telling you?

Time to let go’’

The nails are broken
Filled with flesh
And dirt
Filled with the paint debris
Scratched off the Thick Crust
Hands bruised
Blood oozing
Dripping to the grass
To be quickly absorbed
A very dry summer indeed
As it has always been
A faint trace of vapor rises up
In the hope to reach the Cloud
Over the Mountain peak
The Cloud of Crystals
Not in a hurry to start its journey

A long way to go
Not predetermined
Not planned or programmed
Though details are ready
Embroidered meticulously
With love and memories

A bunch of flowers
Flame red
Grenadine red
Snow white
Apricot yellow
Lively fuchsia
White with orange streaks
Orange with pink strains
Crowned by a layer of big green leaves
The stalk bound with a thick blue ribbon
‘’Thank you, my Love
The best gift I’ve ever received
So colorful
So vivid
Just like the Life itself’’
The flowers nurtured with water
Nurtured with Love
Proudly raise their heads in the glass vase
In the hope to reach the Cloud
Over the Mountain peak
The Cloud of Crystals
Not in a hurry to start its journey

A ceramic cup
Puzzle pieces on it
Four puzzle pieces
Finely handcrafted
A piece of green land
The blue sky
The lollipop sun
Three cypresses beside a yellow house of a door
Four-piece glass window and
A triangle of bricks above
A childish carefree sketch
The cypress
The tree of the Dead
Residing peacefully under the ground
Side by side
Their tombstone summarizing a whole life
The joys and the sorrows
All summarized in a line or two
Cypresses outstretch into the sky
In the hope to reach the Cloud
Over the Mountain peak
The Cloud of Crystals
Not in a hurry to start its journey

Time to rest your heart
No worries
All is taken care of’’

THE OCEAN OF SOLARIS (Friday, August 24, 2012)

A vast ocean
Dense like mercury
Thick like a heavily loaded gray cloud
A palpable fog
You cannot grasp
And hold
In your hands

Not solid
Not real

Encased in this Ocean
Your body is an amorphous slurry
Limbs changing shape continuously
Eyes and mouth barely recognizable
You cannot tell
Where you start
And where it ends

Not solid
Not real

Random paces
Like the motion of a gaseous substance
Or an amoeba
You cannot be sure
Where your steps will take you
To the mountain peak
Or to the abyss
Or there

Not solid
Not real

Your tongue moves in your mouth
To speak out the unspoken words of love and wisdom
To be delighted with the last bite of a delicious food
Tasteless words
Tasteless food
You cannot differentiate
Cliché from unique
Craving from overindulgence

Not solid
Not real

Eyes wide open
Only to see
The creamy thickness of the Ocean
Years spent with your Beloved One
Mouth to mouth
Breath to breath
Every single line on his face memorized
Yet a silhoutte he is
A misty figure from an archaic tale
Armored in a complex net of desires
And dreams
You wove thread by thread
For long sleepless nights
You cannot peel off the layers
To get into the essence
Where the sparkle resides

Not solid
Not real

Separate beings
Floating in the Ocean of Solaris
On a planet called Earth
All asleep
In their dreams
They play the role of a King or Queen
The prince or the pauper
The mother or the father
They picked eagerly
Or accepted involuntarily

A seagull cried afar
And tore the night apart:
‘’Thoughts nurture your feelings
Feelings nurture your thoughts
Neither are solid
Neither are real’’

THE BEAST UNDER MY BED (Thursday, August 23, 2012)

When I was a little kid
There was a beast under my bed
No, not a product of my childish imagination!
I swear
He was there

A dark night it was
As all nights are
The household was sound asleep
I was turning in bed
Waiting for the sleep fairy
To shed her magic on me
When the moonlight leaked in through the window
Tapped on my shoulder saying
‘’Go ahead, little girl
Take a look at him
I’m here to support
And protect you
I will shoot my silver arrows in his eyes
If he ever dares to catch you
You know
He is totally powerless in light’’

A struggle took place
The Curiosity beat the Fear
I took a few steps away from the bed
And kneeled down to peek under
My body pulsating with each heartbeat
Mouth dried up
Eyes wide open

And I saw him

If you ask
What he looked like
I can’t describe
A dark creature he was
Very dark
Like the starless sky on the top of the Mountain
So vast but
No up no down
No right no left
There he was but
No limbs no head
No mouth no teeth
Only two greenish yellow lanterns
Lit in a far-away cabin
Gazing at me steadily
No, not the least friendly
But not like the one fixed on his prey
No emotion as far as I could tell

My heart beat to death
I jumped in my bed
Tucked in the quilt
Careful not to leave a finger out
I knew his territory extended only
To both sides of the bed
And under
Thus I got used to sleep like a mummy
Early or late
Winter or summer
Until the dawn smiled at me
Like a proud mother that
Her child returned home
In one-piece

Years went by
I grew up
And fell in love
Got married
I forgot all about the Beast
Until one night
When I bent down to pick up the bookmarker
Two lanterns hit the darkness
No limbs no head
No mouth no teeth
Gazing at me steadily
No, not the least friendly
But not like the one fixed on his prey
No emotion as far as I could tell

I swear
He was there

And I swear
He winked at me.

LOVE GAME (Wednesday, August 22, 2012)

Everything’s gonna be alright, my Love
Cry no more
Your tears cleanse your heart
Day and Night
Like pearls falling gently
Into the Crystal Lake
Bathed in the Moonlight
I can see you looking at your reflection
The image on the surface calls you
Extends out to hold your hand
To take you to the Noland

I’m here
Right here

Your house is so quiet now
Like before the thunderstorm
Taffy the kitty is about to start
Rolling down the stairs
As you turn your key
Meowing and taking a few steps to the carpet
Waiting for you to follow
In a love game of you two

The pink and red begonias
In the balcony
Have just made it
Leaves softened and almost lifeless
Flowers bent down their heads
Surrendering to the fiery summer sun
Only to be revived when you water them
In a love game of you two

The books piled beside your bed
Covered with a thin layer of dust
Invited in by the evening breeze of the steppes
Some bookmarked
A short comment here and there
In black ink
Blue ink
But with the same hard-to-read handwriting
‘’r’’s almost none existent
‘’g’’s as 9
‘’a’’s don’t look as ‘’a’’s at all
A random pile to be reorganized
In a love game of you two

The dish rack beside the sink
Entertains a hard translucent plastic glass
With a few big red balls
Smaller yellow
And even smaller green ones painted on it
A cinnamon-colored plate
Brown flower in the center
As if drawn with a single stroke of brush
A breakfast knife
Handgrip orange
A fork and a teaspoon
The only guests of the rack
Silenced after consuming all topics for conversation
Waiting for your gentle touch to place on the table
In a love game of you two

The shoes closet organized
Summer sandals in the front
Boots and pumps in the back row
Sneakers in the far corner
Most are wiped clean
Except for the high-heeled navy sandals
The pointed heels covered with dust
The bottom face somewhat worn out
Eager to tell its journey
And add new stories
In a love game of you two

Everything’s gonna be alright, my Love
Cry no more
I am here
Right here

‘’You are mistaken
The image is not on the surface
It’s deep there
Deep in the Dark Water
And I’m ready to hold its hand
To take me to the Noland.’’

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